Myth #1 - Deacons are paid, they are on the parish payroll and will increase our costs.
In general this is not true for approximately 80% of ordained deacons. Thier diaconal assignments and ministry is volunteer, not renumerated by parish payroll. A Deacon may be employed by a Parish or a Diocese for a specific job opening, but that is separate from the diaconal service at Mass, Ministries that he leads or participates in which are not part of the job responsibilites that the deacon may be employed for.
In essence if a Deacon is employed by a parish or diocese, he is renumerated for performing the duties and responsibilities of the position he is employed for. His diaconal service is in addition to his paid position, and he is not reumerated by either the parish or diocese for his diaconal service.
Myth #2 - Deacons wives are also commited to service in the church, since her husband is the deacon.
This is genuinely 100% not true. The wife of a deacon is not held to the same commitments as the deacon, as she is a different person and is not the one who was called to Holy Orders, or ordained.
The Bishop, or priest at the parish where a deacon is assigned may ask the deacon and his wife to carry out a specific Mission as a couple - such as Marriage preparation, or parenting workshops / courses for parents and god parents in preparation for the baptism of children etc.., but both the deacon and his wife would have to agree and freely consent to perform that specific ministry.